View Full Version : If A Monkey Made you a Sandwich, would you eat it ?

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Feb 22nd, 2008, 08:48 AM
But it would be even better if the monkey made you a vegan banana split!

Feb 22nd, 2008, 12:33 PM
Hi all,
I just moved the posts about stealing eggs from chicken over to the everlasting Vegans and Eggs (http://www.veganforum.com/forums/showthread.php?p=422777#post422777) thread.

Feb 22nd, 2008, 12:46 PM
Hi all,
I just moved the posts about stealing eggs from chicken over to the everlasting Vegans and Eggs (http://www.veganforum.com/forums/showthread.php?p=422777#post422777) thread.

That's what I love about you Korn, you always call a spade a spade :D

Feb 22nd, 2008, 01:27 PM
i find vegan related hypotheticals insulting...

Haha, i had a problem with a thread years ago that asked if you were on a desert island would you eat meat, just annoyed me because it aint going to happen so why waste time debating it.
No offence to OP though, just dont care if the monkey made a sandwich or not, but if in the unlikely chance that a monkey did want to make me a sandwich he would have to be a mate of mine who wanted to help me out in the kitchen because he thought he should do something around the house instead of scratching, eating bananas and grooming all day.

Feb 22nd, 2008, 01:32 PM
i would eat a sandwich from a monkey if they made if for me. I love monkeys.


Feb 22nd, 2008, 04:21 PM
The more I think about it, I think I'd decline the sandwich, hoping the monkey would make me a Ferrari instead. ;)

i find vegan related hypotheticals insulting...

I know what you mean. They almost always involve being stuck on a desert island and having to make uncomfortable decisions regarding killing animals and such. Maybe a good approach would be to flip the situation on them and ask, "I'll answer your question if you answer mine first. If you had to kill your daughter or your son, whom would you?" When they get all mad and protest the question is in "poor taste", one could then state that to a vegan killing an animal is similar to killing a person so their question is in "poor taste"!

Feb 22nd, 2008, 06:57 PM
I couldnīt agree more with you on this, Mahk. Brilliantly phrased!

Feb 22nd, 2008, 07:01 PM
everlasting Vegans and Eggs (http://www.veganforum.com/forums/showthread.php?p=422777#post422777) thread.

I'm actually p*ssed off that you're all still debating the monkey/sandwich thing when I offered to make you all a sandwich. Are you saying you think a monkey would make better sandwiches than me??? I'm on Cherry's website and am Queen of Sandwiches!!!

Feb 22nd, 2008, 08:14 PM
I shall have one of your sandwiches reds, at least there wont be any furry bits in the marg.

Feb 23rd, 2008, 02:27 PM
"I'll answer your question if you answer mine first. If you had to kill your daughter or your son, whom would you?"

That's wonderful!!

And put me down for a sammy Red!

Feb 26th, 2008, 08:40 PM
So I was just joking around with my omni room mated about this thread and one of them asked if the monkey was wild or captive......

Feb 26th, 2008, 10:01 PM
If the Monkey was happy to make the sandwich there is no way I'd wish to offend him, so yes, I would eat it.

Feb 28th, 2008, 02:44 PM
If I lived with a rescue monkey (lets call him Keith) who begged me (in his own little rescue monkey way) to teach him the art of sandwich making I would happily oblige. If Keith then decided, using his newly acquired skills, to make a sandwich for me I would naturally eat it because my little monkey friend wished it so. Then we could sit together in the park eating Keith's sandwiches together. :D

Feb 28th, 2008, 09:31 PM
Oo Oo I want a Keith sandwich! I'll gladly pay him for it!

Feb 28th, 2008, 09:32 PM
My brother is filthy. I'd never eat a sandwich he made me. Never!

Feb 28th, 2008, 09:41 PM
Oo Oo I want a Keith sandwich! I'll gladly pay him for it!

Keith will gladly make you a sandwich free of charge :) He's a lovely imaginary monkey :)

Feb 28th, 2008, 09:50 PM
Keith will gladly make you a sandwich free of charge :) He's a lovely imaginary monkey :)

Excellent.. Let's have a vegan potluck!

Mar 15th, 2008, 09:20 PM
Here's an actual non-hypothetical version of the question:

Would you buy this (http://www.thinkgeek.com/caffeine/drinks/9f1f/) tea?

Me? No.

Mar 16th, 2008, 12:37 AM

Mar 16th, 2008, 01:10 AM
Me niether. Same reason I don't go to any circuses...

Mar 16th, 2008, 01:37 AM
Here's another real world example. If a monkey made you an "ape-stract" painting would you keep it?
Cheeta, who is over seventy years old and starred in the original Tarzan movies, makes these at an animal sanctuary for retired apes. Jane Goodall owns one and I think it would be OK for a vegan to have one too.

Cheeta paints for fun, not by force, so I think it's OK. [unless anyone here in our forum talks me out of it;)] I'm against using animals in movies/TV etc but this is a shelter that takes the retired ones instead of the other disposal method: research labs.
More here. (http://www.cheetathechimp.org/index.html)http://nclark.typepad.com/photos/uncategorized/bday8bg_1.jpg

Mar 16th, 2008, 01:49 AM
That is so wonderful! I would keep it, but I would give something in return. However, if they didn't offer it to me, and they seemed keen on having it around to look at, then I wouldn't.

Mar 16th, 2008, 02:03 AM
I tried to find a video of how Cheeta paints but only found this:

There are also elephants that paint but they are clearly being held captive and not vegan friendly so I won't link.

edit:[OK, I changed my mind two posts later.];)

Mar 26th, 2008, 04:35 AM
yes, my strange sense of obligation would leave me no choice but to eat the sandwich. Plus, monkeys are so cute, how could I refuse?

about five years ago, I considered adding eggs back in to my diet, you know, for baking. I was at a really cool co-op that didn't carry meat but did carry eggs and cheese. there was an informative sign on the fridge that listed about twenty "free-range" companies whose eggs were sold at that co-op. Oh, man, so gross. it was a comparative list of what the chickens had had done to them. You know, claws removed, beaks removed, etc. There was only ONE company/farm on the list that provided free-range eggs from hens with their beaks still on. Geez, I really had no idea. Anyway, that threw me off my egg-idea and put me back on course and I still can't do eggs. Maybe the hens on a small farm are treated differently than those that go to market, but I just don't know.

I agree, ask your farmer friend all the pertinent questions then make the choice you are most comfortable with.

Apr 1st, 2008, 09:01 PM
Here is a video of an elephant drawing a self portrait:


edit: [Hmm, my link worked a moment ago but now says " Hobble" :confused: If it still is not working when you read this go to Youtube.com and search for "elephant self portrait" and you should see several identical videos of 8min, 29 sec] or try this:


[Don't read the following unless you've watched the video to its completion]: I'd like to think that the whole thing is real but the romantic gesture of holding a flower is just a little too much over the top for me. I think what we are actually seeing here is a smart elephant that has been taught to replicate a drawing it was once shown ("an elephant never forgets"). If anyone has evidence that elephants are known to hold or exchange flowers in the wild, please speak up! Sorry, I don't mean to be so pessimistic but I still think this is quite amazing on its own. How could anyone ever kill a being able to do this? What do you all think? Does the elephant really know it has drawn an elephant holding a flower? Could be, but I'm not so sure.