Transitioning Children

[skye]

I have a four year-old and an eleven year-old. I have recently become mostly vegan (no meat, dairy, eggs, leather, silk) but am still sorting out things like honey, sugar, vitamins, medications etc. My older daughter is generally resitant to trying new foods and has always been a picky eater, a grazer. She is also at an age in which she is beggining to make more of her own choices and assert herself a great deal more. She is a great influence on my younger daughter who as long as her big sister is not noticibly disgusted by something will eat almost anything. My older daughter is also :( extremely sensitive :( and I feel I need to be cautious with my approach - too much information would traumitize her. For now I have been introducing new foods slowly, baking more and simply cutting back on the dairy she is eating. I am not sure what to do when I meat! resistance I don't want this to become a battle of wills, to invoke guilt or for her to feel tricked, forced or pressured. I also am hoping to completely switch over my youngest by the new year yet am a little unsure on how much to push with the oldest. Advice from those with a similar experience would be appreciated.:)

[ConsciousCuisine]

I am not sure what to do when I meat! resistance I don't want this to become a battle of wills, to invoke guilt or for her to feel tricked, forced or pressured. I also am hoping to completely switch over my youngest by the new year yet am a little unsure on how much to push with the oldest. Advice from those with a similar experience would be appreciated.:)

First, good job moving towards a more compassionate lifestyle!

Now, to address the issues of not wanting to "invoke guilt" etc., it is almost impossible to do something that one SHOULD feel guilty about without FEELING guilty, child or adult...

Also, we have all been tricked by society, the government, our "experts" and are force-fed lies about the animal industry, health and environmental issues. Revealing the truth (while being mindful for her age, developmental stage and feelings) is the best thing any loving person/parent can do for another.

There are some great threads here about parenting, transitioning and the like.

I chose to be truthful with my daughter when we went vegan. I educated her about how animals are treated, about love and compassion for pets needing to be extended to other creatures and so on. Being sensitive, she got it right away- that doesn't mean the transition was effortless! She even begged me to let her see "Meat Your Meat" at one point, to rid herself of the cravings for cheese. I didn't let her see it, and still haven't as I feel one should be a much older teen or an adult to see that horriffic slice of reality (my daughter is 12). She is now a proud vegan who stands up for herself AND the animals (and for the environment and health). It's still not always a cake walk. She just got back from Surf Camp- 6 days and 5 nights of heavy physical activity where the vegan meals left something to be desired- she ended up eating nutrient-void salads, bread, fruit, cereal and soy milk. She got a veggie burger once and peanut butter and jelly once. Other than that, she occasionally had pretzels or chips :( Before sending her, I asked lots of questions and The camp said they had it all covered so I didn't send food. :(


Just illustrating that even after years of being vegan it still gets difficult sometimes and the reasons why you are challenged change as well. I am proud of my daughter and how she handles these challenges. It makes her a stronger, more resilient and open young woman.

This is an opportunity for your daughters to become more open minded and open hearted. Allow them to grow with you. They will benefit form the whole experience.

Please PM me if you have any questions directly.

[skye]

Regarding guilt - true, true. I was thinking over the subject of guilt in the middle of the night last night - yes I woke in the middle of the night thinking it over. To sum up my thoughts - shame is self-defeating and a judgement, guilt I believe points out to us that a different approach/action is necessary. So I suppose its not a bad thing after all. Slowly the kids are adjusting to some of the new foods I have introduced - it's a lot of trial and error. This morning I asked my four-year old Jasmine what she thought we could do to help animals, her response was - "Eat fake meat"!

[Kam]

Regarding guilt - true, true. I was thinking over the subject of guilt in the middle of the night last night - yes I woke in the middle of the night thinking it over. To sum up my thoughts - shame is self-defeating and a judgement, guilt I believe points out to us that a different approach/action is necessary. So I suppose its not a bad thing after all. Slowly the kids are adjusting to some of the new foods I have introduced - it's a lot of trial and error. This morning I asked my four-year old Jasmine what she thought we could do to help animals, her response was - "Eat fake meat"! Cute! I haven't got kids yet but I hope to, and I will raise them vegan - it's something I worry about though, how they will cope, in places such as school and holiday camps and children's parties with cake, ice cream and jelly. Sorry not to offer any advice just yet as I don't have the experience, but I just wanted to add to this thread. Good luck.

[Maisiepaisie]

My ten year old son has recently become vegan when I did, after being a lifelong veggie. His best mate is veggie and people don't often tease them for it because if they do they just beat them up :)

I took my son off school dinners ages ago because they're so unhealthy. I now give him a packed lunch. He's quite worried about going to high school that he'll get beat up for being a vegan and being a skater. I just told him he doesn't need to tell anyone.

I never told my son to be vegan, he wanted to after seeing leaflets about dairy farming and learning how awful it is for the mother and baby calf. He's very committed now, even made me replace his old leather trainers because he hated wearing dead cows.

[princessemma]

maisiepaisie-sounds like you're raising a bright and compassionate young man. As for skating I'd imagine that takes energy and stamina (not that I'd know I did it once,nearly broke my neck) I bet a lot of his classmates consider loosing the TV remote and having to change the channel on the set exercise.