How important is breastfeeding?

**Poppet** · Jul 23rd, 2007, 07:25 PM

Someday in the future, I'ld like to start a family, but I really don't know if I could handle Breastfeeding. I have extremely sensitive nipples and have been through some sexual abuse and rape in the past where my nipples were often touched and I can't stand them being touched at all even now I have to wear a bra all the time, even to sleep so they don't rub on anything, and I just don't like the idea of Breastfeeding.

If you have a good Vegan Formula, how much worse off would your baby be than if it was getting Breast Milk? Is it a big difference or a small difference?

**twinkle** · Jul 23rd, 2007, 07:41 PM

First off, let me say how sorry I am that you have had to go through that.

I don't know the precise differences, just that they say "breast is best" - there's a thread on it around here somewhere.

It's pretty difficult to get vegan formula in the UK - there's only one brand, there are none at all available in the USA. Hypothetically another option might be to express your own milk rather than having the baby suck it - then you would be in control but the baby would still get breast milk. There are also milk bank schemes in some areas. You're probably not going to know how you feel about it until it happens though.

**missbettie** · Jul 23rd, 2007, 07:46 PM

you know breastmilk is the most natural thing that you can give your baby (provided you take care of yourself), and it helps you lose your baby weight (one of the perks). However it is your personal choice, don't let anyone swing you either way. I was not breast fed, I was actually on a soy formula, and I turned great! (I think....)

**Hemlock** · Jul 23rd, 2007, 07:49 PM

I never liked it either Poppet - I'm not crazy abut breast touching in general but I think it's important to let a baby suck for a few days at least if you can handle it so it gets the colostrum, then go onto soya formula.
Have you thought about having counselling about it - if you had counselling now it may help you in the future to see a child as someone to nurture rather than reminding you of past abuse.
Breast feeding can be a wonderful thing - mind you I only lasted 6 weeks and that was enough for me.

**missbettie** · Jul 23rd, 2007, 07:54 PM

oh I also left out, breastfeeding also helps you to create a bond with your baby.....but i'm sure y'all knew that....and i'm sure you also know that there are other ways to bond with your baby....Sorry this is even an issue for you. NO ONE should ever have to go through what you have.

**Poppet** · Jul 23rd, 2007, 08:18 PM

I did have some counseling years ago, and I have had relationships that have been functional and healthy sexually, but I'ld always wear a bra and not liked them touched but it wasn't an issue because my partner understood I just didn't like that, and I have no other persisting problems. I never talked specifically about the nipple issues during counseling, I might not be totally because of the past abuse, it might just be that I have unusually sensitive nipples (that's probably what made that particular aspect of the abuse so unbearable). I don't know if I could express my own milk, It's not just that I don't want them to be touched, I don't want to touch them myself. I manage to wash them in the shower gently, but that's all. When I have children, I would do it anyway if it was really important for their health. But if it doesn't make a big difference I would be relieved not to have to breastfeed.

cobweb · Jul 23rd, 2007, 08:47 PM

i think breastfeeding is important for both physical health (gives baby immunity and correct nutrition), and well-being (the bonding element).

i am so sorry to hear of your experiences

- but you might feel differently about your breasts if you 'use' them for feeding a baby, they might seem less sexual somehow, and this might heal some old psychological wounds somehow.

**missbettie** · Jul 23rd, 2007, 08:55 PM

cobweb;337607

i am so sorry to hear of your experiences :( - but you might feel differently about your breasts if you 'use' them for feeding a baby, they might seem less sexual somehow, and this [I

might [/I]heal some old psychological wounds somehow.

That actually makes A LOT of sense.

**Maisiepaisie** · Jul 24th, 2007, 12:16 PM

Poppet sorry to hear about your experiences. It is quite possible that having sensitive nipples is totally unrelated. I haven't been abused but I too have extremely sensitive nipples and I can't even bear to look at a pierced nipple

I found that once my baby had arrived I actually wanted to breast feed. In the late stages of pregnancy while holding someones baby I felt my breasts tingle and they leaked milk. Mother nature has a way of sorting things out so don't worry too much about it