Oh sorry, I didn't realise nutroast was poisonous and vegetables make you sick!

[Peabrain]

Argh! I just have to vent because I'm just in a really [bleep] mood...

So my husband's cousin and his wife are vegan, and when we stayed with them, they made nutroast. My husband liked it. Understandably, you may think that meant that if I decided to give him a nut cutlet (basically a nutroast in a burger shape) for dinner, he might actually appreciate it, wouldn't you?

No... He just pulled a pained face as if I was depriving him really badly.

Then after dinner his dad rings up, and while they are discussing us visiting on Sunday for dinner, my being "a vegetarian now" comes up. At some point later in the conversation hubby mentioned my youngest son has a throat infection. Of course, dear FIL suggests it's because they're being given vegetarian diets (it's really vegan but they call it vegetarian)...

I had to really bite my lip so hard! I'm even typing this a bit too hard cos I'm mad just thinking about it... *pats keyboard apologetically*

Now to give hubby some credit, he did eat the nut cutlets (which were served with baked potatoes and some garden peas), and even finished it all when I didn't, and he didn't complain (usually I make vegan meals but he adds non-vegan ingredients and in this case that option was not there)... Also, he did say to his dad that I'd been told by the GP that morning, that there are viruses about all over the place at the moment, so not to worry about my little boy...

But the problem is he didn't really say much else and in fact I heard him say "yeah, I know", and I could tell he was just acting as if he merely "tolerated" my ways, rather than supporting them. So when he got off the phone, although I wanted to jam my fist down his throat (okay I didn't really want to but you know those milliseconds where you fantasise about it lol...), I just rationally told him that I was 33 years old, and the children are 15, 5, and 3, and we've had LOADS of bugs and illnesses before we cut out animal products (still only 3 months ago), so it's really illogical to blame it on a lack of meat, besides that fact, only a few months ago, his mum was saying we should eat MORE vegetables!

Needless to say, he could tell I was annoyed, and although I didn't explicitly tell him I expect him to back me up in future, I'm sure he got the drift...

The weird thing is, I don't care nearly as much if people confront me about my beliefs, or why I'm vegan (nobody has though - funny that eh? Afraid of hearing some home truths perhaps?), but I'd at least like to know my husband is on side (I suppose he's got his own hang ups about it though), and what I HATE is any implication about my mothering skills being inadequate (which is basically what judgements on my children's diets boil down to)... I asked him not to mention every single little bug that anyone gets if people aren't going to be supportive.

And to neatly finish my point, I ended with; "Does anybody REALLY think I don't care about the children's welfare? I don't think so!" to which he swiftly became completely apologetic and said he knew I was doing a great job.

Ha! Now you've admitted it - veganism isn't evil after all!

Still [bleep]'ed off, but at least I can laugh at it now... Ah well, 'tis the kind of stuff that comes with the territory I 'spose...

[Mary]

Oh! there there!
I feel your pain!! It's so much harder to take the anti-veg views from the person you love. Even the slightest thing could feel horrible.
My omni bf usually eats vegan with me but he ordered chicken one time at a restaurant while we were together. It stabbed me in the heart a little even though I'm fully aware that he normally eats meat and dairy when he's not around me.

[Peabrain]

Yes, it's a hard one with significant others eh?

I had a little giggle (actually quite a big laugh) though, at my son's retort when I moaned about it whilst cooking dinner tonight, he said; "we're made of meat, why do we need more?"... LOL

Plus I was just talking to hubby about the fact that the place we're going to has some tasty sounding veg options, and he said "if anyone says anything tomorrow, I'm just gonna tell them the very good point you made about people having hypocritical opinions about whether you should eat more vegetables one minute, and then implying veg isn't enough to keep you healthy"... It seems he's been more receptive than I feared.

I love him for that.

[VampireJack]

Sigh - I hear that.
Isn't it strange that if we have the audacity to actually catch a cold then it's "because" we are veg*n?
Obviously every single person who visits a dr with the flu, a cold or whatever aren't eating any meat.....
Seriously, I can honestly say that since turning vegetarian and then vegan my immune system is actually STRONGER than it was before my epiphany.
Don't you all get sick of the "tired, weak, always getting ill" veg*n myth?

Meat eaters get sick all the time - but it's "never" their diet, it's a bug going around!
We get sick and it's obvious it's our unnatural sissy diet that's to blame.....

[Clueless Git]

Meat eaters get sick all the time - but it's "never" their diet, it's a bug going around!

Indeed!

Personaly I like to ask omnis if they think that these bugs get around so easily because of;

(a) Lack of exposure to the naturaly sanitary and bug unfreindly decomposing corpses, and associated disinfecting leakages, of dead animals.

(b) Excessive exposure to well known disease carrying organisms like broccoli and carrots.

[Peabrain]

Pahaha! Cupid slays me as always.

[MisterMonkey]

it's a hard one with significant others eh?

It really is. As soon as I touch on the subject of animal cruelty (for food) my partner stops me from going any further, he says he doesn't want to know, because he will find it upsetting. If I push further with something along the lines of "Just because you won't let me tell you doesn't mean it's not happening," it could easily escalate into a row.

Seriously, I can honestly say that since turning vegetarian and then vegan my immune system is actually STRONGER than it was before my epiphany.
Don't you all get sick of the "tired, weak, always getting ill" veg*n myth?

Meat eaters get sick all the time - but it's "never" their diet, it's a bug going around!
We get sick and it's obvious it's our unnatural sissy diet that's to blame.....

Very true. I have never been what you might call a sickly person, and I *thought* I always felt fine, but since I went vegan I have been pleasantly surprised by how much healthier I feel now. Since last summer I haven't had a single day of illness. A few weeks ago, my other half was absolutely smothered in a horrendous cold, which then became a chest infection - I thought I wouldn't escape that, and sure enough, I began to feel it looming, with a slightly scratchy throat and a bit of a "heavy" feeling in my head... but that's as bad as it got, and within a couple of days it was gone. I'm convinced that had I still been on an omni diet, I would have come down with a stinker of a cold.

Of course, we all get sick from time to time, and the next time I do, whenever it may be, I already know what someone in their wisdom will blame for it.

[The Mighty Bosh]

Nutroast is poison, there I have said it, that thing is not Xmas dinner

[micthemini]

Celery is poison, tis true, honest.
And brussel sprouts are, but they can be neutralised by mint sauce or gravy (tons of the stuff).
See being vegan is dangerous.

[Peabrain]

Arrrgh! Am I going to die? How long do I have left?

[Tabbycat]

Well, you know, it could be if the person was allergic to nuts.

[Peabrain]

Yes, that's true Tabbycat...

Party pooper. You spoiled our sarcasm. *tut tut tut*

[Tabbycat]

Yes yes... I know bad puddy tat.

I've successfully gotten my mom to try a few vegan things but my dad... well at age 66 he's very stubborn. I think my mom would be more inclined to adopt a vegan diet if it wasn't for my dad.

I think eventually your hubby will come around if he sees more of the positive health effects of being vegan. As far as getting sick goes, the last cold I got after being vegan I was only sick for a couple of days compared to it lasting for a week or longer like colds usually do for me. (I have chronic bronchitis, asthma and sinus problems so colds usually find a place to set up residence until I knock them out with a round of antibiotics from the doctor.) I would think that as long as you are providing nutritious, balanced meals for your kids and that they are healthy and energetic, your husband will realize that the vegan diet isn't so bad after all.

It's also possible that he just doesn't want to argue with the family so he's just kind of passive about it when talking to them. That's what I gather from the "yeah, I know" comments.